So it’s been a few months since I last posted. A lot has changed. Most of it is for the better! Lots of positivity but a few negative’s who have poked their noses in uninvitedly!
The biggest change to my life was enrolling onto a Level 2 Counselling Skills course. It’s one morning a week and a fair bit of additional work to do away from the course itself. At the ripe old age of 36 (very nearly 37), I have chosen to try and better myself. Prove to myself that I can learn something different.
Because mental health has played such a big part of my life on a personal level, I have decided that I want to learn more about the helping roles in life. Counselling is something I have received weekly, for over 2 years now! I’ve had several different attempts at receiving counselling over the years (since my teens), but the recent years have been the most effective. Mainly because my current therapist has opened me up and allowed me to accept myself for who I am. Having had negative people in my life for most of my life, I spent many years punishing myself for being somebody I wasn’t. My therapist unbuttoned acceptance along with many other emotions, that I was too ashamed to let out. I will be forever in her debt and think so highly of her as a human being. This lead me on to making the decision to try and learn more about the counselling profession.
I’ve applied for several jobs over the last few months. I’ve been invited to several interviews but turned most of them down, because I just didn’t feel ready. One interview, did however, interest me enough to go ahead and attend! Could I possibly break the bad habit of a lifetime and go for a job? Like actually get suited and booted and go for it? Considering I am a plumber by trade (for the last 16/17 years to be precise)… Well this job was for a hotel receptionist position at a local hotel. I have no idea why it interested me. Maybe because they reached out to me and were interested in getting to know me. Despite my CV basically reading year after a year of plumbing experience, they saw through it and gave me a chance to sit down with them… So sit down with them I did…
On the day of the interview I felt confident and looked at it as a fact finding mission for my own best interests. When I met with them, they were such lovely people – Like really lovely people. They were not the least bit phased by my lack of experience but more interested in me as an individual. I walked away brimming with confidence. I felt like it went really well.
A few days later they reached out and invited me for a second interview and to meet the owner of the hotel. Once again it went really well. They were equally as lovely as the first time and as I left, they said they would let me know by the end of the week if I was successful in my application… A few hours later the owner phoned me and offered me a trial shift! I couldn’t believe it… After more than two years away from work (due to my mental health/breakdown) I had landed a job. This was another huge step forward on my road to recovery.
I went on to work a few trial shifts at the hotel, which I really enjoyed. I didn’t even look at it as work. I looked at it as going somewhere to build my confidence up. Public places and people were something I would avoid at all costs for a couple of years. Mostly because I become very agoraphobic due to my mental illness. But this opportunity helped me kick that feeling right in between the thighs!
I managed to work three shifts in the end, but having given it some serious thought, I decided that the job wasn’t for me. The opportunity helped me massively and for that reason alone – I will never forget the owners and the staff at that wonderful hotel. My future doesn’t lie in a hotel. It lies back where I belong (for now at least). Back on the tools and doing what I do best – being a plumber! It was an extremely difficult decision to make but I am going to get myself out on the road again and being my own boss. At the same time I am going to work more on my blog and hopefully sharing enough content to help a few more of you! I’m not going to go all in this time though with the plumbing. I will pick and choose the little jobs. Enough to help me get by and pay the bills. I am not going to run myself into the ground again, like before. Back before my breakdown, I didn’t know how to say now to work. This time I will assess each job before I say yes! Is the job going to cause me stress? Is it within my skills bracket? Is it something I am confident in doing? Is the customer a nice person or are they going to be more hassle than the job is worth? These are just a few of the questions I plan on prompting myself with before every job! May sound a bit overboard to some of you. But believe me, these a so very important for my well being and mental health.
I know I mentioned a couple of negatives at the start of this post… Well I am not going to ruin a positive post by including them. Maybe I will talk about them in another post? Then again, why should i? Do these negative people and experiences deserve the air time? No they don’t. It’s Friday and it’s all about positivity today! 🙂
Have a great weekend guys! It feels good to be back. 🙂
Let me know how you are and feel free to comment and share the blog as always.
Mr F x